EBIERE 8

 The thing about life is that just when you think your life is all figured out, something comes out of the blues and hits you hard and you almost get crushed. Just when I was beginning to enjoy the long hours of working at M&N pharmaceutical company, my boss brought his cousin from the village to take my place. Where does that leave me? My initial state. Jobless!

Time flies! It was 6 months ago when I got the job and I was thinking God was finally beginning to like me, now I have to start hunting for a new job. Since the son-of-a-bitch handed that stupid letter to me saying I have been relieved of my duties, I have been taking a high dosage of dope. Reality sucks! Who wouldn't want to escape? I mean no matter how hard you try to fix things, you end up where you started.

Nonye broke up with her boyfriend last month, so I moved back into her house after promising to contribute to the house rent. The rent would soon be due, how am I to keep my promise without a job?

"You really need to go easy on that thing, Ebi," Nonye said startling me. I didn't know she had entered the room. I ignored her. "At least, try not to go out when you use it, I am tired of nursing injuries and cleaning cuts." I could hear the laughter in her voice. She was joking, but still, it hurts. I ignored her.

The last time after taking dope, I wasn't thinking straight, I headed for Kunle's house but never got there. I came back home with a deep cut on my forehead. I haven't gone to see Mama and Imade since then, I don't want them to see the cut.

"Don't you think you should see someone? Maybe like a counselor? Oh! Goodness! I wish Nonye would mind her business. I never stick my nose in her business after all. " Ebi" I was surprised that she was still standing there. "Nonye, I get it. I know you are tired of cleaning cuts and babysitting me when I........

"Cut the crap Ebiere! This is not about babysitting and you know it. It is about getting my best friend help. You are wasting away." "I am fine Nonye." "You know what? Damn you! Go to hell Ebiere? I freaking hate it when you sound so cool when you are not. You get high and when your head clears off, you cry yourself to sleep, then you wake up and get high again. I see you trying so hard to be a better person, to be a good mother, but at the least provocation, you escape into an unknown world. You are kind and beautiful, but have you looked in the mirror lately? You look like crap! Yet you refuse to see anything wrong. I am your friend. Your only friend in fact and I want to help you, but no! Superwoman Ebiere won't allow anyone into her space. Not even her own daughter.

" Don't bring my daughter into..........

"And what if I do? I already have. Damn you! Your life is a total mess, the earlier you fix it, the better for you and everyone close to you. In all of these, you know who I pity the most? By this time, she was standing directly in front of me with fury in her eyes. "Your mother beating up herself feeling like she failed her assignment as a mother.

The door slammed in my face before I could think of any reply. Good because I had no reply. I sat on that same spot for a long time till darkness enveloped the room.